Many A Project!

I want to offer several new directions and projects in the blog.

1. My daughter Lucy has started to insist that she pick out all her own outfits. Today she wore a pair of faded black skinny jeans with a black and cream striped tee tucked in. She topped the ensemble off with a cream cardie with pearl buttons and a oversize hair bow off to the side. She then looked at me and stated, "I wish I wore glasses; I need them with is outfit". She then put on some glittery sunglasses and some mauve lip gloss and stated "this will do". Based on this experience, I was advised to document her journey through fashion in pictures as often as I can.
2. I am trying to instill the faith and religion in my children, which is a fairly foreign concept in my life. I am attending Sunday school weekly (which is on Wednesday) and plan to confirm to our church this Easter. I picked up two daily devotionals at class yesterday that assist one in better self exploration through lent. I will document my first experience with daily meditation. YEA!
3. I have an eating disorder and have had one since I was 9 years old. As my oldest and most precious starts to approach that age I want to proactively identify my problem. I have body dysmorphic disorder (really it is crazy) that had lead to both bulimic and anorexic behaviors in my youth along with some aggressive internal self bulling. I often lie about my weight and at times struggle to get dressed or shower due to the fear of facing my body. I am better than I have been in years. But I continue to allow the number on the scale or my percieved number to control my day and my friends and families interaction with me. My view of myself is so loud in my brain that I often can not hear others and/or talk about anything else. That action has got to stop! In order to address this behavior I am going to report my weight (WI- weigh in), my view of my self as a person (PJ- personal journey), and my score in mothering (MT- mother time) at the bottom of most of my post. I engage and encourage feedback related to my post and this battle. Honesty is the best policy and is going to be my first step at inhancing the quality of my own life.

I my hopes these three angles will provide my blog more purpose and truly help me to open up and honor the name by allowing this blog to be a mother's little helper.

WI- 104 (higher than I like/ scrubs as a result)

PJ- 7 (pretty proud of my honesty today but forgot to bring my friend to work)

MT- 9 (I got bows in hair all teeth brushed and everyone got to school on time with no yelling and allowed Lucy to be herself which is not easy for me!)